Eight Arms, Zero Red Flags
Let’s be honest, comparing an octopus to my ex might feel unfair… to the octopus. While my ex was forgetting our anniversary or explaining how astrology was “basically science,” octopuses were busy demonstrating the kind of intelligence that makes Mensa look like a group chat for goldfish.
With nine brains, three hearts, and the ability to squeeze through a hole the size of a coin, these deep-sea geniuses are basically nature’s answer to “What if Sherlock Holmes had tentacles and commitment?”
But this blog isn’t just here to throw shade (although, yes, there will be plenty). It’s here to celebrate one of the most bizarrely brilliant creatures on Earth — the octopus. Over the next few weeks, we’ll dive into their brainpower, behavior, and baffling abilities and gently remind ourselves that maybe, just maybe, our dating standards need to be at least as high as “can open a jar.”
🐙 What You’ll Learn in This Series:
- Week 2: Octopus 101 – More Than Just Sushi
- Week 3: Inky Houdini – Escape Artists of the Sea
- Week 4: Tentacles & Test Scores – The Science of Cephalopod Genius
- Week 5: Emotional Intelligence: Better Than Ghosting
- Week 6: Who’s Really Ghosting Who?
Each post will dive into a new aspect of octopus intelligence and why it absolutely rules my world!.
Subscribe to follow the series, or share this post with a friend who also upgraded from someone emotionally unavailable to someone… emotionally intelligent, even if they live underwater.
🐙 Tag someone who deserves an octopus, not an oops.
